I understand now,
that I never understood a thing.
and your anger,
while at the time seemed inexplicable;
now make all too much sense
in the light of these tearful revelations.
I was always too busy.
Maybe… maybe I understood on some level
and in some sub-conscious attempt
to not have to share in this discomfort,
I focused more on my work
than on you.
I can’t help but feel now,
that that time was time I wasted.
I can’t help,
but to hold a burning ember of regret
in my outstretched hand towards you;
to warm you,
to heal you,
to give you life again.
For these are days now,
that all I see is my indifference to you.
That all I know of our relationship,
Words never said meant promises unbroken,
but it was never your love that waned,
it was never your smile that faded.
while you fought for all we were.
I see now,
just how beautiful your vision of us must have been,
for it to be so worth fighting for.
I never lost sight of your beauty;
I lost sight of mine.
I never betrayed you,
but I abandoned you.
I watched our love live for a time
and watched as slowly
as roses lose their petals;
one by one;
you were gone.
I woke one morning,
either blessed, or cursed
with terrible understanding.
in the light of the light of the spring dawn.
In one moment,
I relived everything
at the end,
I heard you whisper;
“I love you.”