Now I’m a Believer…

I never used to believe in Hell.

 

Until all I could do was watch you,

as you were laying on the floor,

shedding tears, for days

that would never be.

I could see no wounds,

but they were there;

deep

and ugly.

Jagged tears in vital parts of you.

 

All I could see were tears.

Tears that soaked into the old floor boards

of the house your parents were married in.

The place you spent

long, youthful summers.

The place we met and fell in love.

 

We were just kids,

but we grew together,

on long, summer nights,

we counted stars

and told secrets

and formed a bond

that grew roots,

deep as trees.

 

We were married

and had children

and all was right with the world,

until the doctor came in

holding that manila file

and told us that I was dying of cancer.

 

I was gone three months later.

 

Tears still flow and stain that old farm house floor,

your sobs wracking your body,

tearing through you like lightning.

I can only watch you,

though I cannot see your wounds;

I know they are deep

and ugly.

 

My love,

my wife,

you don’t know that I wait for you.

You don’t know that I’m there

and I can’t help you.

 

I never used to believe in Hell.

 

HG – 2016

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